he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
