they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
