tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
