I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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