like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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