I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
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