maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
