I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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