If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize