I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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