Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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