I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I am one with the molecules
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
