I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize