if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Randomize
