bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
