I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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