When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
