Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
