I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
