Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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