The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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