You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
