He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
