okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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