i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize