he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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