I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
