I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
