who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
