Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize