Whoa Z and x make the same sound
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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