Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
