I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
I think my fart just growled at me.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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