Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
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