If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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