I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
