It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
We talked him into tasing himself.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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