I just cut my nipple shaving
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
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