ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
