omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
sex in a hospital.. check
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Randomize
