your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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