so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize