I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
