sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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