so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize