I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Randomize
