Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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