a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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