After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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