he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
