Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
