The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
